Homecoming
by shane'svoice
Summary: One shot. Swanqueen AU. Storybrook. Regina is banished to Storybrook for being too dangerous to the people in Enchanted Forest. Emma doubts her decision about remaining in Enchanted Forest with her family and Henry. Rejected by both Henry and Emma, Regina finds herself consumed by a different kind of darkness.


_*Note: Two songs that inspired this fic were- You Found Me and Say When by The Fray. _

_A bit of background: This is post Save Henry and battle with Pan. Most of the characters have left Storybrook for FTL save for a few. _

_Happy reading._

_..._

**Homecoming**

The night was dark and cold. A strong wind was blowing through the small town of Storybrook, Maine.

Under a flickering lamp by the dock, two figures stood watching the dark lake. A dog sat next to them on the boardwalk. The man wore a woolen sweater, holding the leash of his beloved dalmatian. He nervously checked his wrist watch. Fixed his eyeglasses. Checked the watch again. The elderly woman next to him seemed much more composed. She had her crossbow aimed at the gentle waves rising and falling.

"Why didn't you leave?" the man asked her, "don't you miss Enchanted Forest?"

"Too many memories there. Besides, I've got a nice business running here."

"Do you think so? Even with more than half the town gone?"

"I know the woman. This town will be up an running in no time. Now I may hate her guts but I'm not going to shy away from a good life. I'm not ready to lie in my death bed wishing I had done something out of my life than stay at home sewing blankets and baking pies. This old granny is gonna be the talk of the town when Storybrook is up and running. Life isn't so terrible here. Hell, I was never a witch so I don't care whether I have magic around or not."

"What about Ruby?"

"She likes it here. Well, actually, I think she's isolating herself from Belle...ever since that girl made her choice...anyway, I haven't heard any complaints. Which is a blessing, given the temper my grandchild has. Why didn't you leave?"

"I figured I'll be more useful here."

"Hm."

Suddenly a violent whirlpool appeared below the pier. The two jumped, startled by the loud roaring and crackling that came from the water. A bright green light flashed, blinding them. Something fell on the boardwalk with a loud thud. Then another.

...

"Emma! We were told only she was coming through-

"I'm just escorting her, Granny. Good to see you too, Archie. I really should make sure she gets home safely so, excuse me..."

"How would you be getting back?! All of the beans got used up by the townspeople going to Enchanted Forest."

"Not all of them. I will be leaving within the hour, so-

Regina was already walking towards the mansion by the time Emma caught up with her on the street. They walked quietly, side by side.

"This doesn't mean he cares about you any less, you know..." Emma said quietly as they made their way, "he just wants to live there, among the magical creatures and fairies and all his favourite fairytale characters. He loves you too."

Regina didn't speak.

"And Snow and Charming...they're just...they just don't want any conflict...and the council has it out for you...because of all what you've done...they think its all for the best. You did create Storybrook for yourself, they want you to have it. All to yourself. You can do whatever you want here. And now that there's no protective charm around this place, you can leave! You can travel! Go shopping or...meet people...it won't be so bad, right? I've lived in this world my whole life, its really not so bad."

She let Emma ramble on and on as they crossed the main gates, walked up the porch, into the house and stood in complete darkness. As she was making her way upstairs Emma blurted out something she never thought she'd hear from anyone. Ever.

"I'll miss you, Regina."

She paused on the steps. Then turned around to face the blonde.

"...then why didn't you fight for me?" she asked her, "if I matter even the slightest bit to you, why didn't you stop them from sending me away. Haven't I proved myself enough already? I proved my love for my son. I proved I could be good. I proved I am not the monster everyone thinks I am. Do you not see the injustice here, Emma? Aren't you the saviour? The white knight? Why didn't you fight for me then? You're tossing me away just like every single one of those ungrateful waste of lives I saved from Pan. As soon as I stopped being useful they turned. Once again, all of them turned against me. Even you...even you dammit...after all we've been through together..."

She was shaking with rage. She wished Emma would just disappear rather than stare at her looking hurt. She was so angry at her. More than she was at anyone else. She was furious with Emma.

"I told them you weren't going to be trouble..." Emma mumbled, not meeting her eyes, "...but then they asked how sure was I? They told me I wasn't there when you killed entire villages just to get to my mother. They told me you didn't even spare children. That you're unpredictable. Hostile. Unstable-

"Unstable?! Unst- oh they all know me so well don't they? They have it all figured out. Tell me how stable you would be, if the man you loved with your entire heart and soul was killed in front of your eyes by your own mother, and he was murdered because a stupid girl betrayed your trust and was too naive to keep her mouth shut, and then you had to marry an old fart three times your age and be touched...by him...every night...whether you wanted it or not...and the only purpose of your life was taking care of that insolent child who betrayed you, and be neglected and abused in the process...but you had to endure everything quietly because god forbid your mother found out and decided to discipline you...like she had done your whole life...tell me, Emma, how stable would you be if you were in my place?"

Emma didn't say a word. She walked up to her and gathered her in her arms. Regina was shaking violently. Tears spilled down her cheeks. She let her hold her for a bit. It felt good to have someone's arms around her.

"Just go..." she muttered into her shoulder. Too tired to fight off the woman. Too eager to give in.

"I can't just leave you like this, Regina. I...God I don't know what to do..."

She hated whenever Emma said that. She wanted her to know. She wanted her to be on her side for once, none of the neutral bullshit. She had feelings for this woman that scared her. Because she didn't think her heart was capable of it. Of any of it. And yet here she was, allowing her to comfort her, letting herself feel vulnerable in her presence. Emma knew it. Emma felt it all. Through their magic. Their relationship with Henry. Their mutual instinct to protect their son at all costs. Throughout their journey in Neverland, they had grown closer than ever before. She thought if one person understood her in this world it was this woman. But just like everyone else, Emma disappointed her.

She pushed her away and climbed upstairs. She couldn't get used to her touch. She couldn't get used to counting on her. She couldn't allow her heart craving for intimacy again. Emma was not reliable. Emma wouldn't fight for her. Emma could never...love her...

"I'm sorry..." she heard Emma whisper behind her.

"The last bean is in my office. Bottom drawer to the right in my desk. Take it and leave. They're probably worried sick fearing I might've slit your throat by now..."

She heard the front door close as she entered the small room upstairs.

She remembered picking out the curtains with a wailing baby in her arms. She didn't know anything about being a mother then. She thought blue would be nice. All the boys liked blue didn't they?

At first the room only had a small cot and a dresser. A mountain of baby toys crowded the floor. She rarely let him sleep here alone. She couldn't bear letting him out of sight. She liked watching him sleep at night, drooling and sucking his thumb, sometimes babbling along when she sang to him the only lullaby she knew. The one her father used to sing to her to make her fall asleep. He was her entire world. A little bundle of happiness. Her son.

As years passed, the room changed with him. A bed with blue bedspread and toy cars. Big pillows. A bigger dresser. A desk and chair. A bookshelf.

She remembered the first time he yelled at her, accusing her of being the evil queen. She cried that night, alone in her room, after he went to bed. She had cried all night.

"I can't go with you, mom..." he had told her when she begged him to come along, "this is my family. My real family. I want to stay here! With my real mom and dad."

Regina sat down on the bed and picked up a blue pillow. Her son's words echoed around her.

"_my real family...my real mom and dad..."_

She tightly gripped the pillow to her chest as a horrible wave of emotions rose inside her. She wailed loudly. Tears fell onto the blue fabric.

_You are my son...my baby...my little boy...you always will be..._

_..._

Everything felt so wrong.

Emma sat alone as everyone around her celebrated. Everywhere she looked people were dancing and cheering. The fairies were flying around and sending fireworks blasting up in the sky. Long tables were set up in the Charming's courtyard for the feast. The dwarves were sitting around the table with huge piles of food on their plates, drinking heavily. The whole kingdom was invited. Charming and Snow, now the king and queen, will be making an appearance soon. Henry was walking around with Neal, talking to everyone eagerly. Emma smiled at his little prince outfit. He looked adorable.

They were all finally home.

Except her.

Emma sighed. She felt awkward around them like this. They talked about creatures and places like Firefly mountain, that were strange and unknown to her. They eyed her pitifully, assuring her that she'll learn their ways in no time. Her mother hinted about throwing a ball in the next month, in which Emma would have to wear a big fluffy gown...and dance. She was scared.

The crowd burst into cheers as Snow and Charming made their way down the stairs, arm in arm. They smiled brightly and waved at Emma to come forth.

"Everyone! Welcome home!" Charming held a glass up to his guests, "Snow and I are so grateful to all those who have helped us save our grandson and returned with us to Enchanted Forest. Here's to our magical lives and happy endings!"

"Hurrah!"

"Here's to Emma, our brave daughter and the saviour of our kingdom, for believing in us and fighting for us!"

"To Emma! To the Saviour!"

Emma smiled awkwardly as they toasted her. The queen hugged her. The king kissed the top of her head. Henry came running at her and jumped into her arms, Neal following behind. Everyone cheered and clapped for the royal family.

None of it felt right.

Emma stepped away from the celebrations. She needed to be alone. It was all too much.

She couldn't help thinking about her. About every word she said that night, before Emma left her back there. All alone.

_Doesn't she deserve a home...a family...a happy fucking ending for once...? She deserves a place up there as well. She saved Henry. She saved the entire fucking kingdom while I aimlessly flung my sword. She taught me magic so we could protect Henry. Who am I without her..._

She couldn't shake off the image she had of Regina from that night. It was the first time she had seen her without her defences. It was the first time she had seen her cry. The first time she had heard her side of the story. It scared her. It confused her.

_I fled. I left her there cause I couldn't bear it. I couldn't stand it. _

And she couldn't forgive herself for it.

_I have to go back somehow. I have to fight for her. Make it right. Apologize. God damn it I need to tell her she means something. Everything. I am nothing without her. Nothing..._

...

_They were lying under the starry sky. Their makeshift beds were side by side on the forest ground._

"_When all this blows over, what do you wanna do?"_

_Emma had asked her. _

"_I don't know...probably shower."_

_They both chuckled at that. _

"_No I mean after...for the rest of your life...what do you wish for more than anything?"_

"_To be happy...just to be happy..."_

_Her words touched her heart. Emma gingerly reached for Regina's hand, almost expecting to be slapped away. It felt cold in hers. Regina didn't pull away. _

_They watched the sky all night. Sleepless. Quiet. Holding hands. _

_..._

Days passed by. Regina lay in her bed most of the time. She watched the sunlight enter through the curtains. She heard the little blue birds chirping outside. She waited for the sky to get dark. Darker. Her eyes would grow tired. Then she'd wake up to sunlight again.

She got up when she had to. To go to the bathroom. To eat when the hunger became unbearable.

Everything was tasteless. Salted crackers felt bland. Bread tasted like cardboard. Apples didn't do their magic like before.

She heard people outside the house sometimes. They yelled. Cursed. Swore. They threw a rock through her window when she was sleeping, shattering the glass. The crash scared her out of sleep. She spent the day sweeping glass bits off her bedroom floor. A sharp piece cut across her palm when she tried to pick it up. She winced as blood dripped on to the floor.

She didn't go after them. She didn't chase them down and twist their necks like she would have done in the past. Nothing mattered anymore.

The small blue room was still empty. She was still alone.

She wondered how long it'll take for her to die, if she lay in her room without food, without water. She wished to find out every day but gave up every time. Even her own body was betraying her. Her survival instincts were too strong.

She wondered if anyone would come looking for her after she died. They probably wouldn't find her body until it decayed completely with maggots and flesh eating bugs were crawling all over. Maybe they'll laugh at her rotting corpse. Maybe they'll desecrate her even more and hang her bones at the town square. Maybe they'll burn her house down to get rid of the evil that lived among the good people.

Would Henry mourn her? Would Emma? Would anyone?

The house grew dark and darker by the day.

...

"But I don't want to!"

"Henry listen to me..."

"Yes she saved me and she loves me and I love her too, but she's still the evil queen! I don't want to be her son!"

Emma sighed, exasperated. She had been trying to convince him to come along with her to see Regina.

"She has never been evil to you, Henry, she love you. She was your mother for all those years, don't you miss any of that?"

Emma watched as Henry looked uncertain. She could tell the kid was struggling to hate his adoptive mother. All the evil queen talk was just that. Talk.

"How do you even know you can go back there again? All the beans are gone! Well atleast until the next harvest, which is in a year! Hook's gone too so you can't even sail there."

"Ariel said she'd help..."

"I like it here, mom! And besides I can't leave Dad, we have so much fun together!"

"Henry, I have to go back," Emma told him, "maybe one day you'll understand, kid. Or maybe you won't because everyone here seems clueless to the fact that we have been so unfair to Regina. I can't stay here while she's over there."

"But why?!" Henry almost yelled, "we're a family here! We're happy!"

"Yes, Emma," someone spoke behind, "why?"

Queen Snow walked into the garden where Emma and Henry were standing.

"Go on, kid," Emma nodded at Henry, "I'll talk to grandma for a bit, okay?"

"Sure. Just forget about Regina, okay. I mean, I know its hard, its hard for me too! I try to stay busy so I won't remember her...I really miss her during bedtime though. Dad comes up with horrible scary stories that give me nightmares. Not like mo- uhm Regina. She always stayed until I fell asleep...never mind. I've got horse riding lessons in a bit! See ya!"

And he was off.

"So you want to go back?" Snow asked her, eyeing her closely.

"Yes."

"Why?"

"This world is not for me, Sn- mom. I don't belong here..."

"You're our daughter, Emma! Of course you belong with us! We're a family!"

"We are. We always will be. But there's someone I need to take care of first. Someone who needs me. Someone I need desperately in my life. She is my happiness...and...I think I might be hers..."

The queen glared at her. Her words were slapping her in the face. Emma tore her eyes away from her and watched the sunset. The sky was glowing bright red over the lake. The waves shimmered in gold and silver under the warm light. The birds were flying towards the forest, chirping happily.

She had to admit she'll miss this. The Enchanted Forest was sure beautiful.

"So where will you go?" Snow asked, fighting back tears, "back to that town we were cursed to? Back to the woman who began everything? Ruined all of our lives? Don't break apart our family Emma! I only just got you! Don't leave home...please..."

"I'm not leaving home, mom. I'm going back to the one person we all have wronged. If one thing I've learned from you and Dad in all this time we've spent together, is forgiveness. Unfortunately no one here is willing to forgive her. I am. My heart tells me to go after her. I need her in my life. Going to her doesn't feel like leaving home, it doesn't feel scary...it doesn't feel uncertain. I feel like I'm going home." Emma said.

Her mother broke down completely and reached for her, still begging her to stay. Emma hugged her tightly and tried to soothe her.

...

"What is this thing?" Emma eyed the slimy, green coils on her palm. They looked like tentacles.

"Gillyweed!" Ariel called out from the water, "you put it in your mouth and jump into the water. You'll be swimming like me in no time. I can take you with me to Storybrook then!"

"Emma are you absolutely sure?" her father looked suspicious, "what if it doesn't work? Is this really what you want, sweetheart? We were all doing so well. Maybe you should give Enchanted Forest another chance..."

"This is not just about being a misfit, Dad. I have to go back. Someone needs me there...I need her..."

Emma pulled Henry into her arms and softly spoke to him, "think about what I've told you, kid, okay? If this works then I'll tell Ariel to bring you by Storybrook whenever you feel ready. I know this feels like the land of your dreams. Fairies. Dwarves. Sword fighting. Living in a huge castle. Being a prince. Life in Enchanted Forest is amazing! But I know that eventually when the magic wears off, you'll miss your old life. Just like these fairytale characters missed their home here, you'll miss your room, you'll miss school, your video games...and more than anything you'll miss the woman who took care of you your entire life. You and I, Henry, we grew up in a different world, in a different time than this. You may not feel it yet, but when you do, remember you have a home there too. I'll be there. And so will your other mom, and we both love you so very much."

"You won't ever come back?" Henry sniffled. His eyes were red from crying.

"I'll visit as much as I can. Maybe we can find a way to talk...like your mom's two way mirror...we'll figure something out. I am not abandoning you, kid, I'm telling you that you have two worlds to choose from. You can choose one or both. Its all up to you."

She hugged him tightly. It was killing her inside, seeing her son so heartbroken. But Henry needed to learn. She wanted him to be sure of his choices. Unlike herself.

At least she was sure now. This was the only thing that had felt right in months.

She was finally going home.

Emma waved back to the small crowd by the shore. She put the gillyweed in her mouth and chewed. It felt rubbery and dry. Suddenly she couldn't breathe and started coughing.

"Jump, Emma! Now!"

Coughing and spluttering Emma jumped into the lake, diving deep below the surface. Ariel followed.

...

The doorbell rang and rang. No one answered.

She waited around. Banged her fist against the door a good few times. Yelled.

Nothing.

_Is she gone? Did she leave town to travel around the world? It's only been a month..._

A noise turned her attention to the back of the house.

Emma made her way through tissue paper rolls and rotting vegetables scattered across the lawn.

WITCH was spray painted in red on the white fences. DIE EVIL BITCH in black.

Two young boys were on the tree, one was hanging from the branch and peeking inside the house through a broken window.

"Hey! What do you think you're-

"Oh shit! Jim run!"

Before Emma had a chance to chase after them they scrambled off the branch and sprinted towards the fence.

CRACK!

Something flashed bright red inside the room with the broken window.

_Oh god...oh no...she's still in there isn't she!_

As smoke started pouring out, Emma frantically started climbing the tree.

She swung back and forth from the low branch and crashed through the opening. The jagged pieces on the ledge slashed along her sides. She didn't care.

Thick grey smoke was bubbling out of a canister on the floor. Her eyes burned.

Someone was violently coughing.

"Regina?! Regina, dammit I can't see a thing!"

Her legs hit the corner of the bed and she toppled over on the mattress. Regina was there under the blankets. She found her footing again and pulled the woman up with her. Supporting her on one shoulder, Emma blindly moved through the smoke.

She kicked the bedroom door open and fell into the corridor. Her lungs were burning.

The smoke started clearing while they gasped for breath. Emma finally saw her.

It was like staring at the face of a corpse.

Her face was ashen. Her cheeks hollow. The circles under her eyes were deep and dark. The lips that were once bright red were pale and dry. Her collar bones were sticking out. Her night gown clung to her body almost like another layer of skin.

"Regina...?" she spoke her name. The woman didn't look at her. She tried to stand up on her own, pushing against the wall for support. Emma rushed to her side when she nearly fell down again.

"...what...are you doing here...?" Regina croaked. Her voice was a whisper.

"I...I came back for you..."

"Why..."

Before Emma could reply the woman collapsed in her arms.

...

Regina sat on the living room couch under a warm blanket. A nice fire crackled inside the fireplace. She watched the bright flames.

Emma was in the kitchen, singing along to the music coming out of the radio.

"_...will be your man...your man...say when...my own two arms will carry you tonight...tonight...say when...and my own two hands will comfort you tonight...tonight...say when..."_

She has spent the past two days at the hospital undergoing various testing. Apparently her blood glucose level extremely low. Frankenstein had handed her a whole bunch of vitamin supplements and a long list of food she should be eating.

"Okay so, I'm not very good at this whole...cooking thing...but I can follow steps from the website. This looked very promising so...here," Emma spoke as she lowered a tray on the coffee table in front of her.

There was steamed rice on the bowl with what looked like stir fried beats and other garden vegetables. Her stomach grumbled at the sight of the food and she eagerly took the bowl from her.

"Here's some OJ to go with that...now do not throw a fire ball at me if the veggies don't taste too great, okay. I tried."

"Oh but my dear, it'll give you a chance to practice that deflection spell I taught you..."

Her own words surprised her. _How long had it been since she had a decent conversation with someone...?_

Emma looked at her, then chuckled. Regina smiled a little bit.

"It's not so bad...could use a little salt..."

"I'm on it!" Emma jumped up on her feet and headed back to the kitchen.

The living room looked brighter than Regina could ever remember. The curtains were moved aside. All the lights were on. Emma had swept and wiped the place clean. Flower vases sat on the windowsill. She saw red roses and white lilies The air was filled with their sweet fragrance.

"Here," Emma handed her the tiny salt shaker, "I'll see if there's any ice cream or anything. Or maybe chocolates around...what do you feel like eating during a Mr. Bean marathon?"

"Why are we-

"He's funny! Also its the only good thing on tv, today. Now what would you like to eat while we laugh our pants off?"

"You know..." Regina said, thinking, "both. Triple Chocolate ice cream, white chocolate bars, popcorn, chips and hell even throw in a pizza."

Emma gasped. "Who are you and what have you done with Regina Mills?!"

"Don't get too used to it. I'm probably having these odd cravings because of your presence. Once you leave...again...I'll be back to my usual self...and eating habits..."

Emma knelt on the floor infront of her and looked straight into her eyes.

"I am not leaving again. Ever. Now finish your vegetables while I run to the supermarket."

She stood up, then leaned down and kissed the top of Regina's head.

Regina didn't react or say a word as Emma left. She smiled, putting a spoonful of the deliciously cooked meal into her mouth.

A warmth was spreading inside her heart that had nothing to do with the beautiful orange-yellow flames in front of her.

Regina really liked this feeling.

...

"Sorry I'm late!"

The crowd gasped inside the town hall as the door burst open revealing the mayor.

"You're in my seat, dear," she said, eyeing Granny as she made her way to the front. The elderly woman quietly left the middle seat and backed away into the crowd.

"Welcome back, Madame Mayor!" Sydney Glass was smiling brightly, "a picture for the Daily Mirror?!"

"Why of course!" Regina smiled and posed. Her red blazer and black skirt clad form was captured by the reporter's camera.

"I heard Emma's back in town, Madame Mayor?" Ruby called out, "will she be joining us today?"

"The...sheriff is busy at the moment. Some hooligans with an awful lot of nerve had the audacity to violate my private property. She is looking into the matter at the moment. Now, shall we go into the town proceedings? Obviously the biggest question in everyone's mind right now should be, how to attract people to our town?"

"Do we really want outsiders coming in?" someone quipped.

"Well why not?!" Regina asked, "this is the life you all have chosen for yourselves. You want to move forward. Start fresh. This is our chance! We have to work as a town to have Storybrook up and running once again, better than ever. And I..." Regina paused a bit, eyeing the room, "...I can not do it without all of your help. There will be a volunteer sign up sheet outside. We will need people to advertise. To attract tourists. We will need builders to fix up all the destruction left by evil. As the year goes by there will be jobs opening up for you. We have a long road ahead of us. I hope I will have all of your support."

The silence in the room was deafening. Regina nervously looked at Archie, who smiled encouragingly and started clapping. Suddenly the entire room burst into applauds and cheers.

"Who are you and what have you done with Regina Mills..." Granny spoke, chuckling and clapping.

Regina smiled and bowed to her people.

...

_This is what it meant to feel alive. _

_Lying naked on top of her chest. Listening to her breaths. Kissing the pale white skin. Tracing her fingers over the long scar along her side where she cut herself trying to protect her. Her arms wrapping around her. Her voice whispering in her ears. _

_Telling her the one thing she was dying to hear all this time. _

_I love you...I love you...I love you..._

_Her white knight. Her lover. Her saviour. _

_She could cling to her as hard as she wished and it wouldn't break her. She could push her, hurt her, even throw her away and she'll come back. She will always come back to her. She will always save her. _

_Someone would miss her if she disappeared forever. Someone would mourn her. _

_But what mattered most was that someone loved her unconditionally. _

_She could lay on her chest day and night, and forget about the world around her. She could kiss her forever and never be satisfied. She could make love to her all night and want more. Her touch brought her back to life. Her arms made her feel safe. Her love healed every single wound that she had ever received. Every pain she had ever endured. _

_The darkness inside her wiped away with every touch of Emma Swan. The echoes of her past disappeared every time they made love. _

_She could tell her this without fear. Without hesitation. _

"_I love you, Emma." Regina whispered in the darkness of her bedroom. She waited for the arms to wrap around her. Then the soft kiss on her forehead. They had fallen into a pattern and it was the most beautiful thing in the world._

_The best part came next. _

"_I love you too, Regina."_

...

_*End note: The prompt for this fic was very unexpected. I mean really I was just reading for my law class and kind of fell asleep then this idea suddenly hit me. I just had to write it even though I already have an on- going fic to update. I hope y'all enjoyed. I did my best. Feel free to feed me your thoughts! Thanks for reading!_


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